Is it okay to have an affair? Is it okay to have a sexual affair with a man? YES, and YES, you are NORMAL!
Here's the thing, many men realize quickly that women that join Ashley Madison, are curious, and real, but they are also cautious and most times unwilling to actually have an affair, because women are far less risk taking then men are. These men who joined Ashley Madison and discovered that most of the women require countless hours of communication before they will actually meet a men, end up disappointed. These guys get tired of 'chasing the women' who have no intentions of 'getting caught'.
The men know the women are real, but also know that they are not as willing to have an affair as men are. The men who are looking purely to have a sexual affair, often come to Down Low with resevations about having an affair with another man. These same men are straight, heterosexuals, who are conflicted with the idea that allowing a man to give them a blow job, or giving them a blow job, makes them gay. They are NOT gay. The men who actually get over these thoughts of confusion, find that Down Low is where they should have been looking to have an affair to begin with.
Some marriages are matches made in Heaven. A man and a woman who are perfect for each other get married, and after decades of marriage, they still just as much in love as they were when they were dating. Those people are the lucky ones. Not all couples remain in the "Honeymoon Phase" of their marriages forever. Sooner or later, most people change. Be it from life's curve balls, too much work and not enough play, or just daily stress, one partner or the other ends up feeling neglected, unattractive, unloved, or unwanted. It can be in a physical or emotional manner. That's usually when affairs begin.
Most people feel that affairs are wrong - marriage vows are sacred! But in most cases, they can actually be quite healthy, and in some cases, they can save a marriage that was doomed to end in divorce. Affairs could be viewed almost as physical or emotional therapy. They help you fill voids and parts that you thought were lost, boost self esteem, and improve your general disposition. When you feel good about yourself, you're more confident - and that is very attractive to your spouse!
The thought of having a secret lover that your spouse doesn't know about can be exhilarating! For a man, having an affair is just as therapeutic as going to the gym and exercising. After all, what man doesn't want his sexual desires filled? He has the fun of telling the wife he's working late, or going out to play golf, and all the while he's out on the town (or staying in!) with his affair partner. The excitement of living a taboo lifestyle is enough to get anyone's blood pumping!
So you can see how when both spouses are happy, content sexually, and have boosted self esteem, their marriage can actually improve. They are in good moods, so they talk more - perhaps even spend a little more time together so that the other spouse doesn't begin to grow suspicious. Some folks may disagree, but many believe that when done properly, an affair is a good thing that can bring peace and harmony into a bad marriage. Why deny yourself having your physical and emotional needs met if it means you can have an easier home life? Many people have tried it and found that it was better than any couples' therapy, and usually much less expensive. So if your marriage is on the rocks, perhaps you should get a blow-job so you can relax and enjoy life for a moment. It just might save your sanity and your marriage.
Engaging in sexual activities with another man does not make you gay. It simply indicates that you have certain desires that your wife or girlfriend are not helping you fill. Think about it as being heteroflexible.